Afraid of my Boyfriend

by Jessika
(Brisbane)

Question: I just want to know why my 2 yr old is afraid of my boyfriend. We went on a holiday to tazmania to visit my dad and ever since we came home my little boy has just been so afraid of my boyfriend.

I have asked him if he has smacked him or even just yelled at him, but not meaning to scare him. I just don't know how to approach this situation.

I find that my boyfriend and I are fighting a lot every time I ask him if he has done anything to make him so scared. He puts up this big wall and won't talk about the situation. I just don't know what to do ?????

Answer: I can't really tell you why your son is afraid of your boyfriend. Despite that it sounds like you probably already know the answer to your question. Defensiveness is a bad sign.

The most important thing is that your son feels safe and if he continues to be afraid of your boyfriend then that is a bad sign that he does not feel safe with him.

We had a similar incident with a babysitter where our son suddenly became extremely afraid of her and we had to come home. He even started to be extremely upset anytime we left him anywhere, such as preschool and daycare right after the night.

He was afraid of not only her, but also any females that resembled her. We have no idea what happened as she wouldn't say, but we never asked her to watch him again.